Even if you have just broken up with your boyfriend for the sake of it, you may still be haunted by the thought of “Did I do the right thing?”Love is hard to break and is an addiction.There are things you can do to avoid falling for your ex.
Step 1: Stay out of his way.
” Out of sight, out of mind” is the motto when dealing with the aftermath of a break up.The less you run into your ex, the better.Sometimes you have to see him or run into him.If you can, avoid contact outside of these times.Staying away means cutting off contact via social media.Remove his number from your phone, unfriend him, and stop following his posts.Break the chain that connects you.It is possible to make new connections later on.It’s not a good idea to avoid him because you hate your old partner.You’re showing that being around this person makes you feel weird.
Step 2: If you can, avoid his friends.
If you were used to spending a lot of time with his friends, it can be hard to break up.Limit your exposure to these people.You will have trouble getting over your ex if you are around his friends.If you want to get past your ex and move forward, you need to cut off contact with these friends.You may be able to get to know some of these friends later on.If you don’t have many friends who are close to your ex, hang out with a few of your most trusted friends.If you’re feeling blue, you may want to focus on making new friends.
Step 3: There are places and activities that may cause temptation.
If these are things you shared with your boyfriend, they could become temptation traps.You can’t help but pine for him when you associate such things with him.If you were trying to quit drinking, you wouldn’t go to your favorite bar.You should be able to get back your favorite places and things for yourself eventually, but it’s best to avoid temptation while your break up is still fresh.If you run into your ex at your favorite restaurant or the first spot where you kissed, avoidance is the most prudent option.
Step 4: When you can’t avoid contact, stay polite but distant.
Sometimes you have to see your ex face-to-face.He could be in your biology class or working at your local grocery store.It’s not worth the effort to make a scene or hurt his feelings in these cases.Keep your conversations short, but smile and be pleasant.He will not be able to bring back difficult emotions if he does this.It is not a good idea to be “just friends” with your ex.If he was at fault for the break-up, you are only justifying his treatment of you by deeming him worthy of friendship.If he’s always around as a friend, you’ll find it harder to escape your romantic feelings for him even if the break up was perfect.The best revenge is happiness.Showing him that you’re doing well without him is a way to show him the mistake he’s made.
Step 5: Don’t look at your relationship through glasses.
It can be hard to think about your relationship after a break up.Try to see things in a different way after a few days of mourning.Your relationship wasn’t perfect because you broke up in the first place.It will be harder to fall for your ex again if you remember the bad parts of the relationship.I’m not sure what went wrong.Find your heart.Be honest with yourself.Did one of you not like it?Is it possible that you have different life priorities?Is there a lack of trust?Were you treated with respect?Were you betrayed?If you look at a past relationship honestly, you can move on from it, but also prepare yourself for the next one by identifying potential problems and warning signs.
Step 6: Don’t try to get revenge.
The urge to get even with your ex may be strong after a bad break up.You might start to think that embarrassing him in front of his new partner is a good idea.They are not.You’re still obsessed with your old partner, that’s what this behavior shows.It can seem childish to others and lead to embarrassment in the long run.Don’t hate.Work to get over your ex so that you don’t have to think about him again.You may feel guilty after a mean-spirited prank if you broke up in the first place.You may hate your boyfriend if he cheated on you.You may not want to see him unhappy if he never betrayed your trust.The tiny rush you feel after you avenge your ex can never make up for the amount of time you spent with him.Revenge is a dish that is best not served at all.
Step 7: Distract yourself from what you enjoy.
It’s okay to treat yourself after a break up.It’s good for resisting the urge to spend time with your ex because this will make you feel better.If you’re at home feeling down and starting to think that a reunion would be a good idea, divert your attention to something you love.You want to replace an addiction with a healthier one.You can play a sport, bake a pastry, or put on your favorite music.You won’t be thinking about your ex for a while.If you get wistful for your ex outside of the house, consider using portable distraction.Playing music, movies, or games on your phone can be very useful for this.
Step 8: Don’t talk about boys when you’re with your friends.
Spending time with your friends is a great idea after a break up.Some topics of conversation are not helpful.Don’t talk about boys when you’re hanging out.Your ex is off limits, but boys and romance should also be avoided.Even if your ex has nothing to do with these people, hearing them talk about them can make you miss him.This can be awkward to bring up.Do you mind if we don’t talk about boys tonight?If your friends don’t get the idea, you might say something like “I’m just trying to get my mind off the subject.”The “white bear” example is something to watch out for.The name comes from the idea that if someone tells you not to think of a white bear, the first image likely to pop into your head is one.If you make a big deal about not talking about your exes, you may inadvertently steer the conversation that way.
Step 9: There are positives to being single.
Being without a partner can have benefits.Getting back with your partner will seem less appealing if you keep these in mind.You now get to spend more of your money on yourself, so you can be happy about that.There are more hobbies and interests you can pursue now that you have more time.It’s not necessary for you to do things that you don’t like just to make your partner happy.You don’t have to hang out with unattractive friends.You are free to pursue other guys.
Step 10: Stay active.
You can feel depressed and drained of energy after a break up.Take the time to get up, get out of the house, and be active in all of your favorite ways as soon as you can.Anti-depressant effects have been proven to be caused by physical exercise.Any kind of activity is a good idea.Doing something outdoors can make you feel better.If you want to keep your mind and body busy, tackle a home improvement project or volunteer.The urge to think about your ex will diminish once you give your mind other options.
Step 11: Don’t be afraid to check out other guys.
Your ex isn’t the only good guy in the world, even if you broke up on good terms.It’s up to you to meet the good people.Don’t think that your ex is the only one you can ever love.You’ll realize that you were wrong when you feel those sparks with a new person.You might be concerned about getting into a “rebound” relationship with someone who isn’t as good as you deserve or someone that is too much like your ex.You don’t have to stop looking if you want to get involved with someone else.Before you go back into the dating waters, have fun “scouting” the area.