If jealousy gets out of control it can hurt your relationships.You can deal with your jealousy by figuring out where they come from.To avoid misunderstandings and to reduce your feelings of insecurity, do your best to communicate openly with your partner.Enjoy being in love, but make sure to take care of yourself and your emotional well-being as well.
Step 1: Try to find the root of your jealousy.
Being jealous in a relationship doesn’t necessarily mean you are a bad person.Try to remember where your jealousy started, whether it was in your current relationship or a previous one.Understand the context in which it was developed by considering the events and circumstances surrounding it.If your partner cheated on you in a previous relationship, your jealousy may have developed.
Step 2: It’s a good idea to note if you feel jealous when your partner is around other females.
If you feel jealous when your partner spends time with other women, it’s probably because you’re not happy.The situation may be uncomfortable because of a fear that your partner will be unfaithful.Do you know if they have demonstrated this kind of behavior in your relationship or if you have a mild form of paranoia?People with mild paranoia have a tendency to suspect that others have ulterior motives.
Step 3: When your partner talks about their ex, ask yourself if you get jealous.
It can be hard to remember your partner’s past relationships, but remember that they are a part of their history.If you feel inadequate compared to your partner’s past loves, ask yourself if you are jealous.This could mean a self-esteem issue that has nothing to do with your partner.
Step 4: Do you still hold long-held beliefs about relationships?
You can give yourself unrealistic expectations if you make assumptions about how romantic relationships should be.Look for relationships that could be problematic and reflect on your beliefs about them.Try to come up with more realistic ideas about being in a couple.It’s a good idea to assume that your partner should be attracted to you and no one else.Films, television, and fairy tales may be sources of unrealistic romantic ideals.
Step 5: Speak to a counsellor or therapist if you have jealousy.
If you want to avoid jealousy, a counsellor or therapist can help you identify the causes.Book an appointment with a specialist in your area to discuss your feelings.It is possible to give a new perspective to your relationship by sharing your experiences openly.Any underlying anxiety that may be making your jealousy worse can be dealt with by a counsellor or therapist.You can find a counsellor or therapist in the U.S. by contacting your local Mental Health America affiliate.
Step 6: Tell your partner about your jealousy.
Feelings of jealousy can get out of hand if you keep them secret.When you are feeling jealous, be upfront with your partner.Let them know that you’re telling them about your jealousy so that they can control it in a healthy and honest way.If you worry that your jealousy will get the better of you, use this strategy.I am trying to control my jealousy so it doesn’t hurt our relationship, because I’m feeling a bit paranoid about you spending time with your work friends and not inviting me to join you.
Step 7: Tell your partner what you need.
We can’t expect a romantic partner to know everything we want, so it’s important to be upfront.Clear your limits and outline your expectations.A lack of knowledge about your feelings can leave you unfulfilled.If you’re not comfortable with your partner spending time with an ex-girlfriend, tell them.If they agree with you, it’s best to be open about your feelings.If infidelity is a deal-breaker for you, be clear with your partner.
Step 8: “I” statements are used to communicate with your partner.
“I” statements help people communicate how they feel about someone else’s actions.An “I” statement should briefly establish the situation, express the feeling you have about it, and state its effect on you.When talking to your partner, use these statements as much as possible.You could say, “When you don’t answer my phone calls, I feel worried and it causes me stress.”If you focus on your own feelings instead of what they did to upset you, you can still get your point across.
Step 9: Listen to your partner to show their understanding.
When your partner talks, let them know that you are listening.Don’t interrupt what they say.Check in with the person after they finish talking to make sure you understand what they said.Say something like, “It sounds like you’ve been feeling discouraged and stressed out at work.”
Step 10: You should work out compromises that make you feel appreciated.
It is bound to create tension in your relationship if you make demands without considering your partner’s feelings.Provide solutions to problems that benefit both of you in order to foster a sense of trust.While maintaining your own boundaries, this will show you are taking their well-being into account.If you’re upset about your partner going to a sports event with a colleague instead of you, it’s a good idea for you to attend a show the next week.
Step 11: To quell your jealousy, don’t snoop on your partner.
Nothing that you uncover will be helpful to you if you are uncertain about your partner.You will be breaking their trust by violating their privacy even if you find something that proves your partner is not trustworthy.Fight the urge to check on your partner by reading their texts or emails, searching their internet browser history, and going through their belongings.
Step 12: Social media should not be the center of your relationship.
Spending too much time on social media can cause jealousy.Instead of posting pictures of you and your partner on social media, focus on your relationship.It’s a good idea to avoid communicating too much over social media because it can foster distance between the 2 of you.If you see an article that your partner would enjoy, send it to them by email or show them it in person instead of posting it on their Facebook wall.
Step 13: You can boost your self-esteem by reminding yourself of your best qualities.
You can be vulnerable to feelings of inadequacy and jealousy if you have low self-confidence.Making a list of your strongest attributes will boost your self-esteem.Positive thoughts will ward off negative feelings about yourself.Write down things like “I am generous” or ” I make people laugh.”
Step 14: Enjoy your time alone.
When a relationship gets co-dependency, one or both of the parties may want to spend all their time with their partner.Take time for yourself to do things that you enjoy.When your partner does things without you, you will feel less jealous.You can take advantage of your time alone to read a book, go for a run, visit a spa, watch our favorite TV shows, or shop.
Step 15: New interests and hobbies can be pursued on your own.
Both partners have their own interests in mind.Keeping both parties occupied can help reduce jealousy.If you want to boost your self-esteem and protect your relationship, try an activity like: Photography Dancing Playing an instrument.
Step 16: You shouldn’t compare yourself to your partner’s girlfriends.
Over thinking about how you compare to your partner’s former loves can be harmful.For a reason, former relationships are in the past to concentrate on the strength of your current relationship.Your present happiness will be overshadowed by the past.Don’t look for your partner’s exes on social media.