How To Calm a Teenager

It can be hard to deal with a teenager’s emotional outbursts.Your teenager may feel overwhelmed by their emotions as they mature.empathizing with them can help calm them down.Try to understand where they are coming from by talking to them.If you decide which issues are not worth fighting over with your teen, you can help avoid fights.You can make sure your teen is in good mental health by scheduling a doctor’s appointment or counseling.

Step 1: Show kindness.

Try to understand where they are coming from by listening to them.Put your feet in their shoes.Active listening techniques can help you understand and communicate with your teenager.Discuss your teenager’s feelings.Listen back to what they are saying and feeling.If your teen is complaining about the amount of homework they have, you could say, “You sound stressed out and overwhelmed by your responsibilities.” If that is not how they feel, they will usually correct you with their true feeling.Ask questions that are open-ended.Ask questions that don’t require a yes or no answer.How do you think you could solve that problem, or how did that make you feel?

Step 2: Listen with an open mind.

You want your teenager to tell you more about their lives.You need to listen to them with an open mind if that is the case.Allow space for their perspective, ideas, and feelings in open communication.If they tell you about something you don’t like, keep your cool.If your child tells you that they got a body piercing, don’t say anything like, “How on earth could you do that?” or “That was a stupid decision!”You could say, “If you want to do something like that again in the future, please come talk to me first.”

Step 3: If you have an alternative solution, offer it.

Help your teenager understand why they made a bad decision.If faced with a similar situation again, help them think of what they could do.If they come up with alternate solutions to help them feel heard, support them and compliment them.Some suggestions could be made by you.Ask your teenager to come up with a few ideas as to how they could deal with this problem next time.Have them come up with two or three ways to deal with it.

Step 4: Don’t use name-calling or swearing.

If you want to see your teen adopt, role model the behavior.Do your best to remain calm and keep your behavior in check as you may be angry at your teenager.Do not respond in kind if their language is inappropriate.Be a bigger person.They should not be abusive to you.When they have calmed down, tell them you will talk to them again.You could say that you are angry at me.You can express your anger, but I will not allow you to call me names.Once I know I won’t be attacked, we’ll continue this conversation.

Step 5: If necessary, apologize.

If they know you will admit when you’re wrong, they’ll trust you more.Teens hate it when adults don’t acknowledge their mistakes.If you apologize to your teenager, you won’t lose authority.It can help foster a more respectful relationship.If your teenager knows that you will treat them respectfully and as equal, they will be more likely to respect you.Apologizing is a way to model accountability for your teenager.You could say, “I’m sorry that I lost my temper with you yesterday over you not mowing the lawn.”I shouldn’t have overreacted because I was disappointed that you broke your promise.I hope you will accept my apology.

Step 6: It’s not easy to acknowledge adolescence.

It probably wasn’t easy for you to go through adolescence.It is the same for your teenager.Teens have a lot of stress.Your kid is maturing into an adult and is dealing with pressures from school, homework, friends, popularity, dating, after-school activities, individuality, and hormones.He or she is carrying a heavy load.Even if you think their complaints are silly, they are real for your child.If your teenager encounters these situations for the first time, they need non-judgmental help to navigate them successfully.If your teen is receptive, you could discuss some of your own experiences as a teenager.It could help your teenager understand that they are not alone.If your daughter is distraught after the break up of a relationship that lasted less than a month, you could tell her how hard it was.I cried for a long time.Breakups are horrible when you’re younger and don’t have a lot of experience with them.I’m sorry.

Step 7: They should be encouraged to express their feelings.

Talking to them about the benefits of expressing their emotions is a good idea.They may feel resentful if they don’t.They may have more aggressive behavior.If they are not comfortable talking to you, encourage them to talk to a trusted friend or adult in their life.You could say, “I would hope that you always feel comfortable coming to me with any important problems, but I know you may not always want to.”I know you have a soccer coach.Encourage your teen to take up a hobby that allows them to express themselves creatively, such as music, art.Don’t take away this outlet as punishment.They could be helped by it.

Step 8: Your teenager wants your approval and still loves you.

It may not seem like it, but your teenager wants you to support them and be involved in their life.Being there for them will make a positive impact, even if they don’t show gratitude or complain about your presence.Don’t take teenagers’ outbursts personally, they are naturally emotional.Attend your child’s athletic events or music performances.It will matter to them that you showed up.Commend your teenager for their grades, part-time job, kindness, or any other trait that makes you proud of them.

Step 9: Determine what values you want to enforce.

Most families have behaviors and actions you value.As your teen pushes back against these values and your expectations, you may want to relax your enforcement of other behaviors.List what you value the most in your family.Being generous, showing kindness, living your faith, or being of service to others are some of the actions that could be considered.Decide which values you want your teen to uphold, and decide if you will be more flexible with others.If you decide to make “showing kindness” an enforced value, you might be willing to let your teen skip religious services now and again.Tell your teen what to expect.We value family above everything else in our house.I won’t let you off the hook for Sunday dinners with grandma.I won’t negotiate with you on family activities.

Step 10: They should be allowed to take some responsibility.

Give your teenager the freedom to make their own decisions.When they will need to hold themselves accountable, give them the chance to learn some skills now.Give your teenager more financial responsibility.They might have a part-time job, or you might give them an allotted amount of money per week.This is a good time for teens to learn how to manage their money.If you think they are making a stupid purchase, don’t try to stop them.Allow your teenager to wear what they want, within reason and their school’s dress code.If they want to dye their hair or shave their head, back off.It’s part of who they are.

Step 11: Take a break

If your teenager is irate, any attempts to discipline them will be counter productive.Give him or her time to cool off.It can be dealt with later if the situation calls for punishment.After both of you have had time to calm down, approach them calmly and continue the discussion.You could say, “Now that we’ve both had a chance to cool off, I want to talk to you about what you did.”

Step 12: Give them space.

adolescence is the process of becoming your own person.Make sure you give them enough time to figure themselves out, and enough space to grow.Don’t smother them while maintaining a solid connection.You should be aware of the importance of your teenager’s social life right now.Allow them to hang out with their friends.If you think they’re trustworthy, give them more freedom and be aware of who they are hanging out with.

Step 13: Be reasonable with your expectations.

Don’t expect your teenager to act like an adult all of the time.They still have a growing brain even though they look more grown up.They will sometimes act like a younger child and make mistakes.If your teenager is working hard, doing their best, and is kind, they are doing well.The teen shouldn’t be compared to others.They don’t need someone else to chiming in because they already do it themselves.Don’t say, “I wish you were like Mary.”You could say something like, “I’d like to see you put more effort in on your math homework.”

Step 14: Your teenager’s brain is still growing.

The growing and developing brain is part of the reason for emotional outbursts.An adult brain has an emotional and impulse regulation system that an adolescent brain does not.The system is still maturing.The brain of a baby and toddler is still learning to regulate behavior, so give your teenager some patience.The brain doesn’t stop developing until the twenties.

Step 15: The teenager should be taken to the doctor.

Make an appointment with their doctor to make sure that everything is okay if you find your teenager’s emotional outbursts to be difficult to manage, or they seem abnormal to you.Your doctor can suggest getting them evaluated for mental health concerns.If you have noticed a decrease in school performance, you may want to get them evaluated.There are problems with attention, concentration, and memory.There are big changes in appetite, sleeping and energy levels.Aggressive behavior or lashing out.Crying, anxiety, or feelings of despair.Poor hygiene.Stomach ache or headaches are recurring physical symptoms.

Step 16: Don’t let your teen use drugs or alcohol.

If you suspect your teenager is abusing alcohol or drugs, confront them.Legal consequences and lasting effects on the brain can be caused by recreational drug or alcohol use.It is a good idea to note your child’s suspicious behavior, for example, when they come home smelling like smoke or alcohol, or staying out past curfew.If you have a lot of pills, count them.You can use this evidence to confront your child if you keep track of anything unusual.Ask the doctor to do a drug screen for your teen.Your child’s doctor can ask a number of questions about drug habits, assess their level of risk, and do a urine or blood screen.

Step 17: Consider counseling.

If you want your teenager to understand their behavior, explore their feelings, and develop strategies for handling triggering situations, you may want to have them see a counselor.You could ask for recommendations from your doctor or health department.If you see issues with your teenager that are related to family issues, consider family therapy.You and your teenager, along with the rest of your family, may learn better ways to communicate, as well as discuss any family concerns with a professional present.

Step 18: Your teenager should be taught how to deal with emotional issues.

People of all ages can benefit from learning how to take care of themselves when stressed.Consider teaching your teen some calming techniques, like meditation or yoga, or showing them some favorite calming strategies of your own.Talk to them about taking care of themselves.Self-care can improve your physical, mental, or spiritual health.Exercise, taking time to yourself, or spending time in nature are some of the activities that are included in these activities.Provide your teenager with activities that will help them feel better.