If you feel unable to function without another person in your life, you could have a problem called Relational Dependency.The relationship may start off healthy but if one person becomes more dependent on the other, it can lead to an unhealthy relationship.Self-actualization is an essential need that motivates our behavior and is needed for personal growth.Those who are independent and self-reliant are more likely to survive in society than those who rely on others.Control of basic tasks and life skills will help you stay in control of your life and will contribute to making you a happier person.
Step 1: You should assume responsibility for your life.
Responsibilities that enable people to experience independence are part of being self-reliant.Doing simple things such as paying your bills on time, cleaning up after yourself if you make a mess, and going to work or school can help you feel more responsible and self-reliant.If you don’t have a job, you have to look for one, seek education that will lead to employment, or start your own business.
Step 2: Be aware.
Having information will allow you to make your own decisions and assert your independence.You should keep up with what’s happening in your place of business, school, town, state, and country.It’s possible to lobby and vote for the ability to keep chickens for fresh eggs in your area if you know that a local law is coming up for a vote.
Step 3: You should know where you are going.
You need a sense of direction.Something needs to drive you.You should have an idea of what you want to do after college if you are attending college.You can set goals for yourself.If you want to meet your goals, be realistic about what you need to do.If you don’t know what you want to do with your life, seek out a career counselor.Career self-assessments can be found online.This website can offer helpful guidance.Guidance counselors are available to all students at most schools.You can use these resources to create a vision for your future.
Step 4: You can make your own decisions.
Allowing people to make decisions for you is giving up your independence.Make decisions for yourself based on your goals and dreams.It’s not necessary to give up your ability to make your own decisions if you want to.If you are looking for a place to live with a roommate, make sure you make decisions based on what is best for you.If you prefer to rent a house and have more independence than an apartment building, do not allow your roommate to talk you into something that you don’t want to do.Some people allow their spouses or significant others to make all the decisions in their relationship, from where to go out to eat to what kind of car to buy.Having a part in the decision making at both daily and long-term levels can give you greater control over your life.
Step 5: Understand how to manage money.
Allowing someone else to manage your money can lead to unwanted debt, little freedom to use the money as you see fit, and a loss of financial acuity about how to handle finances.These outcomes could make you more dependent on the person managing your money, which not only makes it difficult to leave an unhealthy relationship, if needed, but also has the potential to create difficult position should that other person no longer handle the finances.
Step 6: Get out of debt
According to experts, your total monthly long-term debt payments should not exceed 36% of your gross monthly income.They are taken out.Credit cards and student loans are included in long-term debt.If you have more than 36% of your gross monthly income, you should create a plan on how you will pay down the debt.Transferring balances to a lower interest rate credit line is one of the possibilities.If you own your own home and can re-finance, it may be possible to use the equity in your home to pay down your debt without opening another line of credit.
Step 7: You can pay with cash instead of using a credit card.
Don’t add more to your running total while you pay down your credit cards.Squashing the debt you generated in the past is the only way to get out of debt.If you don’t have the cash to cover the costs, skip the purchase.Don’t borrow money from a friend or family member.
Step 8: Cash is always on hand.
It’s easier to pay with cash if you keep a large amount on hand.You should keep your cash in a safe place.If unexpected expenses arise, make sure to build up plenty of savings so that you can pay them off without taking on more debt.Saving can be used to make a 0% interest loan to yourself.It makes more sense to save than to pay down your debt.
Step 9: It’s possible to own a home.
One of the best ways to build wealth is to own a piece of property.When renewing a lease, landlords can change the terms of the lease which may force you out of a living situation before you want to change.You don’t want to take on a mortgage payment that exceeds 28% of your monthly income if you’re buying property within your budget.
Step 10: You can live within your means.
Don’t forget to create a monthly budget.If you are honest about your expenses and build in allowances for unforeseen expenses, this is possible.If you don’t know where your money goes each month, it’s a good idea to look at your living expenses.A sample monthly budget could be as follows: Mortgage/Rent: $1,000 Car payment: $400 Gas/Electric: $200 Water: $30 Cell Phone: $100 Television/Internet:$100 Food: $800 Entertainment: $150 homeowner’s insurance: $300 Car insuranceSeeing the expenses as compared to your monthly income on paper may make you aware of what you can and cannot afford.This gives you a chance to talk to people with whom you share money and set expectations about how money should be managed, which keeps you involved and more self-reliant.
Step 11: Know which things you must be responsible for.
Whether you are aware of them or not, some things are your responsibility.Being aware of them allows you to take care of yourself.
Step 12: You can cook your own food.
Allowing others to cook for you or buying ready-to- eat meals compromises your self-reliance.You can save money and eat better by cooking your own meals.You can learn to cook from television or take a class.If you’re not comfortable in the kitchen, you can take a class at a local community college or follow a chef on one of the food network channels.Easy recipes can be replicated by even the most hesitant chef, thanks to the shows hosted by celebrity chefs.You can ask a relative to teach you how to cook.This is a great way to learn how to cook.You can learn to cook family recipes or bond with a relative.
Step 13: You can plant a garden.
You can grow your own food to harbor independence.A garden provides an inexpensive and interactive way to produce fruits and vegetables on a seasonal basis, which may also provide higher satisfaction when it comes to eating.If you live in an urban area, you may not be able to grow a full-sized garden, but you can keep a tomato plant on a balcony or grow herbs to flavor your food.You may be able to use or contribute to rooftop gardens in some urban areas.Some communities offer gardening tools for rent.If you are a beginner, these resources can help.
Step 14: Emergency health basics.
Knowing what to do in an emergency health situation can help you save a life and make you feel more independent.You can take a class.In addition to the Red Cross, community colleges and hospitals offer courses in cardiopulmonary resuscitation and first aid, which can help you know what to do in the event of an emergency that involves choking or unconsciousness.During an emergency, learn what is necessary.If you were in the wilderness and a snake bit a friend, what would you do?You will be the go-to person in an emergency if you know how to tackle the “what if” scenario.Instructions on what to do in a wide range of situations can be found in the Red Cross application for portable devices.Medical equipment is used for practice.If you or your partner require ongoing medical treatment, depending on a health care professional to give an injection or an IV on an ongoing basis may not be very convenient.If you want your loved one to have greater independence, you should ask a nurse to teach you how to use certain at- home devices.
Step 15: Understand how to fix an auto.
If your tire blows, don’t be that damsel in distress on the side of the road.Waiting for automotive assistance can put you in a vulnerable position.If you want to see how these repairs are done, you can use YouTube.It is possible to find a video for your exact make and model car if you need a non-standard method of repair.You can learn how to change a tire.Basic tire changes can be performed by anyone.The basic formula is to loosen the lug nuts, raise the vehicle with a jack, remove the tire, place the spare tire on the bolts and lower the car.Ask for a demonstration from a trained professional.You can learn how an engine and belts work.Being able to see when a belt is about to blow can save you time and money.Changing belts are simple tasks where the labor charge for the mechanic will far exceed the cost of the belt itself.Real financial savings can be offered by taking the time to do it yourself.It is a good idea to practice performing a basic oil and fluid change.On a rotating basis, vehicle oil and fluids must be changed.A simple oil change can be done at home.Your owner’s manual can tell you what mileages you need to perform certain maintenance tasks.
Step 16: Take care of your health.
Staying as healthy as possible on your own will allow you to keep your independence from prescription medication.It’s a good idea to exercise regularly.The American Heart Association recommends that you exercise 3 to 4 times a week.You can keep the blood flowing and tissues healthy by exercising on a regular basis.It’s a good idea to eat a clean, healthy diet.When you respect your body, you fill it with wholesome food that is grown from the earth and in its original state.In order to nourish and preserve your body, ditch processed, greasy fast food, packaged chips and sugars.
Step 17: Know when you can see your doctor.
It is possible to take control of your health by never going to the doctor again.There are cases in which medical assistance may be necessary, and this is not always the best approach.If you stick to a healthy diet and exercise routine, you may see your doctor less often if you have a chronic condition.You should keep a regular schedule of healthy check-ups and routine tests based on your age and risk factors for early detection.Do you know if you are at risk for certain diseases due to your health, family history, and lifestyle?You can learn the warning signs for life threatening conditions such as heart disease, stroke, COPD, chronic lower respiratory disease and cancer.Alzheimer’s disease is one of the most common causes of death in the US, along with flu and pneumonia, and suicide.
Step 18: Live off the grid.
If you want to assert your independence, try living off the grid.You can save money on energy expenses by living off the land.Consider growing your own food.Learn about the different types of food that can be grown and eaten in the wild.Some plants in the wild are poisonous and should not be eaten.If you follow local hunting regulations, you may be able to hunt for your own meat.Alternative energy can be explored.You can join the green initiative and investigate alternative energy resources.You can reduce your carbon footprint by taking a few simple steps.If you agree to a lease that eliminates the financial benefits, make sure you don’t take on debt.You should try before you buy.If you don’t know if you can live off the grid, you may want to look for a vacation rental home in a secluded area such as an island or an isolated forest.
Step 19: You can learn to take care of yourself.
Emotional self-reliance means that you can process your own emotions and not have to rely on others to do the same for you.Learning to process feelings and emotions on your own means learning how to look for less obvious reasons for feelings rather than taking things at face value.This process can lead to insight about the root of your feelings and ways to avoid them.Professional therapy, self-help books, and certain religious teachings can be used to learn how to be more thoughtful.
Step 20: Adhere to feelings of self-reliance.
If you already feel emotionally self-reliant in your relationship, you should try to keep that feeling even in the face of a major change, such as expecting a new child.
Step 21: It’s a good idea to avoid emotional “triangles”.
People respond to hurt feelings by engaging others to help them process the experience and by avoiding talking with the person that hurt them.The psychologist calls them triangle situations.
Step 22: It’s appropriate to express your anxieties.
If there is something weighing on your relationship, make your anxiety chronic, or try to solve the problem for you, by sharing experiences without allowing other people to heighten their anxiety.People should act as resources to one another, but should not make the situation worse or replace an individual’s own thinking.
Step 23: Responsibilities should be shared equally.
When two or more people have a shared responsibility, individuals must be self-reliant by meeting their individual responsibilities in a fair way.People need to be able to meet their individual responsibilities.Each person in a relationship needs to be confident in their ability to fulfill their responsibilities as well as their loyalty to the other people.If a couple has a baby, they will both have responsibilities as parents and as caregivers.If one person stays at home to care for the child, the person who goes back to work will have different responsibilities and concerns.The person who stays at home has unique responsibilities.
Step 24: Ask for assistance when you need it.
You should try to distinguish between the problems you can solve on your own and the ones you need help with.If your threshold for going to someone else is too low, other people may be less willing to help.You might become dependent on others.If your threshold is too high, you may start to see other people as selfish and unsupportive.You might not get the support you need.If the person does not develop a dependency on any one person for processing emotions and the partner doesn’t feel like loyalty and commitment have been lost, using others for help is healthy.
Step 25: Determine if the new challenges are shared or individual responsibilities.
There will be issues and responsibilities that are specific to one person as relationships grow.One needs to know if the issue is their own or shared, and they need to engage the other partner or other resources as needed.Like a President or other head of state discussing an issue with key advisors, the individual must be able to trust himself or herself, as well as the people being consulted to be self-reliant.He or she must make sure that the other person is involved in the decision.As a couple’s child grows, both parents must develop their own relationship with the child while also co-parenting, especially on larger issues that require both of them to work through (e.g., going to college).While recognizing the right of the other parent to do things differently at times, people must take care of their own responsibilities and feelings.
Step 26: Journaling can be used to process emotions.
A journal can be used to keep track of emotional development in a relationship.A journal is a day-to-day record of your activities, but it is different from a diary in that the focus of the writing is inward and reflective.Instead of simply saying that you and your partner went to look at baby furniture, you focus on how you felt throughout the experience, using the events of the day to help organize your thoughts.Journal writing is self-directed and has no fixed rules or procedures, but there are some tips that may make it easier to start.If privacy is important to you, this spot should be relatively private.Allow yourself time to reflect and relax before you write.Music stimulates your emotions.Write when you are ready to leave.Don’t worry about spelling or word choice.Do not worry about how others will read what you are writing.It’s a good idea to think of your journal as a confidential space.
Step 27: Don’t give up with your journal.
If you have trouble writing, use one of the prompts.Take the first emotion word that comes to your mind, grab a dictionary, thesaurus, or any book, and flip through until you find an emotional word.Don’t spend time selecting a word, just take the first one you find.There is an emotion word below.If the emotion was important to you, take a week to write with all six prompts and use the seventh day to read over what you have written.What does it mean for you to feel sad?When did you feel the most emotion?Are you connected to others when you feel sad?When did you feel the least emotion?Are you more connected to others when you don’t feel emotion?What do you think about others?What is the cause of this reaction?emotion> is included in a quote.To find a quote with your emotion word in it, use an online quote search engine.
Step 28: Take a look at your journal entries.
As your journal grows, you should periodically review what you have written to see how your relationships have changed.Take responsibility, be informed, know where you are going, and make your own decisions if you see room for more self-reliance.
Step 29: If necessary, seek counseling.
Getting help from a good therapist can make you feel better.Journaling can bring up emotions that can be difficult to deal with on your own, so be prepared to ask for help if you begin to feel anxious or depressed.